[ "The Frontiers" Gathering ]

Last week I was invited to a gathering.... I was still working (TBS CP) so i claimed my working hours and went out around 7pm. I was called up by Abqaree (my senior in Hi-skool) and we all meet up at MCD..

Then We all go for movies .. "Bangkok Dangerous".. the movie is a bit draggish..

Me and Nelsey.. my good old crazy-mazey school mate

Sayyyy cheeeeeseee!!

Our looong tickets.. oooh i love tickets

Then went for coffee-coffee story-story at Sri Sempelang (the one at Asia City)

dat guy at the end look sooo cute... hehe

this is the guy who invited me.. hehehe

so that's all... hehehe.. nothin much. but it was fun to meet a few of my seniors and my batch... ahahha... till then...

[ The Expired report on the Kadus Entertainment Gathering ]

hahha.. been away from typing for a while. Here is just a brief of the 18th Oct Kadus Entertainment Gathering. The event held at Pusakag Cafe/Studio , Penampang 25 minutes away from town (depends on the traffic)... so I went there with Ricky. I already reserved my holiday since September and I think It's worth that I went there.. haha..

Pose for the cover Rick!


Gideon, Betcy (She won best dress for female) , Bernard, and me


My favourite singer that nite. her voice is so OTT..... I aaaam chaaaanggiiing~~~


I like this guy. so bamz!.. I mean cute... Owh Reno! Sepa ada number dia!!

ANd I won an award dat nite! I was the Best Dress/ Best Style for male that nite! and my face was in the news..(mau jg bagitau) ekekekke...

Overall.. the event was ok. hehhe.. I enjoyed the food and the crowd and especially the performances. but there's a few bad karaoke-like singin.

ok till then!!

[ Will Update ]

Will update soon... so stucked up with work... got holiday pun masih penat. aduilaaaa

[ Thought of the day ]

No one's REALLY honest nowadays.

[ I've been tagged ]

I've been tagged by Claire. so I just put anything here. since Im busy with work.. so this is what I manage to put here

1. The person who tag/pass you this is?
-> Claire

2. Your relationship with her/him is?

-> A friend...

3. Your five impression of her/him?-> B.E.A.U-TY.. ekekekke

4. The most memorable thing she/he had done for you?

-> I dunno.. maybe the comments around here?

5. The most memorable thing she/he had said to you?

-> hope there'll be one..

6. If she/he becomes your lover you will?

-> owh gosh.... I dunno. that's so against my sexuality.

7. If she/he becomes your lover, thing she/he has to improve on will be?

-> I dunno...

8. If she/he become your enemy, you will?

-> I'm so gonna kutuk her here. ekekeke...

9. If she/he become your enemy, the reason will be?

-> no reason now..

10. The most desired thing you want to do for her/him now is?

-> to thank her

11. Your overall impression of her/him is?

-> She's nice and loud.

12. How you think people around you will feel about you?

-> they think Im a slut.. I don't mind.

13. The characters you love of yourself are?

-> I'm friendly (and that's a problem)

14. On the contrary, the character you hate yourself are?

-> I'm over-sensitive

15. The most ideal person you want to be is?

->myself

16.For people that care and like you, say something to them :

-> I care and like you too...

17. Pass this quiz to 10 persons that you wished to know how they feel about you.

-> They are :
malas mau taip sebenarnya... sepa2 jakla.. ekke
1. John
2. Ricardo
3. Ali
4. Jahmeez
5. Lan
6. Alus
7. Jerry
8. Girllyen
9. Reno
10. anakjagung

18. Who is no.6 having relationship with?
-> No idea

19. Is no.9 a male or female?
-> male

20. If number 7. and 10 are together, will it be a good thing?
-> Ooo nooo... might be a quarrell between the "cousin"

21. What is no.2 studying about?
-> Boys... and stuff.. hahaha

22. When was the last time you had a chat with no.3?
-> thru phone

23. What kind of music band does no. 8 like?
-> Gamelan.. akakakka

24. Does no.1 have any siblings?
-> yah.. yah

25. Will you woo no.3?
->Owh totally NEVER. can't be girls on girls... that's lesbo

26. How about number 7?

-> I'll think about it.... ekekke

27. Is no. 4 single?

-> maybe

28. What is the surname of no.5?

-> nama bapa ba kan? lupa.. ekekke sorry lan

29. What's the hobby of no.10?

-> ermm.. forgetting friends maybe? or maybe he likes english.. so it could be teaching

30. Does no.5 and 9 get along well?

-> they don't know each other

31. Where is no.2 studying at?

-> Austral ACademy.. dulu la

32. Talk something casually about no.1?
-> He's a guy

33. Have you tried developing feelings for no.6?
-> never crossed my mind

34. Where does no.9 live at?
-> at his house

35. What colour does no.4 like?
-> blue and white?

36. Are no.5 and 1 best friends?

-> I don't know. but they're at the same state

37. is no.7 the sexiest person in the world?

-> owh... tough Q.... I thought it was me? hahahha

38. What is no.6 doing now?
-> going somewhere... typing probably... ekekkee..


that's all.. sorry la.. I'm to up tight with my job. hehehe.. hey hey...

[ Quote of the day ]

Ok.. Last few days I went out with my best butties from high-school. it has been 8 years and yet still going strong. hehehe.. I even made a poem for them called "The Fours" (including me in it). so that one fine evening after Break-Fast....

We were talking about being ourself in public or anywhere... I wanna make my point by saying that I don't go around being fake. Or as they call it control macho. Instead I said

"I don't fake my acting in my public"...

get it?... meaning that I was still faking it by making that statement. me and the gang were laughing so bad that the drinks we just consume was about to errupt out of our mouth. so I ammend my sentence to:

"I'm not fake"

simple.... hehehe...

Ok... this dashboard belonged to Fred (the chubby guy wearing glasses). Owh gosh. It looked like 10 Maine Coon Cat just died to get that fur spreading all over his car.

At Starbux....

I love them. Presenting from the left

Christie ML CLetus, Mohd Ali Yusof, Fred Adzieren Among, and

the fabulous Nooraliff Ismail. LOL...

this poem I made especially for them and myself:

The Fours

Casted from thousands

Destined in one town

sang their names in four sounds

each of them had their own crown.

A burly emo-freak

A drudgy valedictorian

A callow social-suicider

An egocentric self-adorer.

Pictured them together

only one thing stays in common

they're friends forever

the only best of them

Bunch of harlots

but they're just having fun.

Almost a decade in the making

They evolved

They discovered

They enthralized

They're the fours.

[ Food Review ]

Sawaadee kaapppppp.... Last month's SBG provide us with gift bags. I realize there was still a lunch coupon unused. so me and Riqi decided to go to Mango Cafe at Star City Complex A.K.A. Asia City Complex the same day we went for the International Cat Show.

That coupon was lunch for two with 7 items. so those are the dishes. yum yumm..

• Tom Yam
• Beef Stew
• Pandan Chicken Honey
• LemonGrass Iced Tea
• Rice
• Sayur masak Belacan. ekekeke....

cost us Rm28 for all of the items. usual price would be around RM48

Tom yam and Beef stew (I guess so)

Refreshing LemonGrass Iced Tea . (and I just need to have another one)

Pick ur head. hahahha

Faces of a satisfied Food Critics.

The food and environment was serene. everything was to our likings. Nice background musics (thai songs). we enjoyed our lunch as well as the open space's simple landscape.

[ International Cat Show ]

Last week I went to the Cat Show held at Sabah Trade Centre near Likas Square. me and Riqi had to pay an admission of RM5 just to get an entrance stamp from EC.

So here's a few of the Meows that we managed to capture during our tour there.

Me and riqi famishly looking at the caged feline.

An this is the judging ring for those who brought their cats. this is the place where your cat being judged and tagged to see how high your cat's breed is. and she's Diana Rothermel. The cat Lady from Cat Fanciers' Association.

kesian those cats kena kurung. still cute. might consider Jobie to enter the ring next year. hahaha... well Overall I kind off hate the way the owner of each cats being so rude to the spectators. There's this wrinkled lady who shoved a girl away for trespassing a 2cm (which I think she made that territory her self) line from which the cats are being held hostage. I mean have some courtesy la. like no one's gonna steal her cat jgk. Macam la cantik kucing dia.

[ That's all. we love our cats. keep smirking y'all! ]

[ Sadness around the corner ]

Why do I always fall for someone who doesn’t love me as much as I love them? And it turned out that they’re more in love and passionate with their scandal. Am I too strong or is it just me that had been expecting my partners to be as obsessed as me?

Or was it insecurities? Can’t I have insecurities in my relationships? I mean I can be a freak sometimes but I need a comfort message not silence. If I let my partners free to move… what would happen? They feel as if there’s no control and free to mingle.

And then when “stuff” happened... Who’s to blame? It’ll always goes back to me. I was too insecure they said. But was it my fault? It’s not my lips on their scandals. Right? It’s not me who said

"I’m still single” though the fact that their already had a partner.

A bit of control is a necessity. i'm not saying to be a freak control. Of course we need a fun and casual relation somehow… but why do we keep secrets? (owh god I love secrets.. it's like orgasm) Why do I need to be almost honest all the time? Why do they keep their past aside? I seriously don’t know why are they afraid.

Will I not be able to except the truth? I can. It’s just they never try to talk to me. They tend to assume that I’m over-sensitive. Yes that’s true. I am. Can’t they talk to me? It’s a simple conversation. Talking. Face to face. Why is it so hard to talk? Talking bah… used those vocal chord, mouth, tongue, and lips to talk. They’re not just for kissing and sucking (mind me I'm horny at this paragraph).

Simple stuff. But they thought I’m making a big deal out of it. I was just trying to talk. Reality and crappy stuff. And when I started to talk they thought I was over sensitive and they started to get emotional and angry. Talk. It’s simple. Talking and explaining. It’s not hard. I may be redundant. But it’s always healthy to remind someone although it’s annoying. Help me. My memory is not healthy so as you. Then you’ll be helped. Everyone is satisfied in the end.

I’m afraid to talk. I became so much more sensitive and extroverted over stuff that doesn’t need to be bothered. I tend to think too much over things. Was it my fault (again)? Yes. I let it be. But there’s no support. People keep thinking I was their pain in the ass. Then why keep it like that? I thought they like those “pain” in the ass. Why complain but didn’t composed to it. Why not resolve to it and face me? Was it hard? NO. I don’t kick or punch people. That’s not my nature.

People should explain why and what things that they don’t like before I got smeared with saliva. If once or twice was ok. But if it’s continuous like the blocks of Sinsuran’s shop lots might cause trouble. This kind of lag made me emotional and crappy.

When my partners ended their relationships with me. I’ve felt as if I’m unattractive. Those other scandals win them over. I seriously believe people who have lower attractiveness have a great deal of chance to be dumped. Don’t believe me? BELIEVE IT. I’ve seen unfortunate-looking people to get dumped by their (so-called super-cute) partners.

"A” was dumped because “N” thought “A” was childish. Totally a big capital BS I state here. I’ve seen “A” by my own contact-lenses eye balls. I thought MJ is much cuter than him. I don’t assume. I knew “N” very well.

I felt like I’m used for someone’s transition to heal. I do. People like me somehow adapt themselves into bitches and whores. That’s what made them feel good. It is a dumb choice but what can that person do? They need remedies too. Their ex's are happy with their other half's. don't we (who are broken) deserves to be happy?

But somehow I realize that things like this had to happen because it made the world go round (not literally). without it I won’t be able to meet people in those circles. And without their loss I won’t be able to exchange places. Right? The perfect phrase would be,

"All things always happen for a reason"

And when people said to me...

"It’s not you. It’s me”

I think that’s not true. It’ll always be about me and you (Cassie singing at the background). There would always be a problem in each partner whether they like it or not. And how to know what are those?

So Simple….. Just talk. it's not easy but it's simple.

Ignorance is bliss. True. It’s vengeance in tranquility as I put it.

[ I'm sorry if i never been a good partner or a good communicator. But thats my flaws. they can't except my flaws and all. but maybe somebody else will. ]

[ Anticipation ]

Rest in peace my heart
Impaired by the darkest hours.
Cleanse this hatred off, dear love
All I want is with me when you’re near.
Ravage my poignant days, dear bliss
Drought ruled the year I live in
Of life that weren’t meant for me.
Urge my insanity to dreams, dear hope
Never should I suffer again
Thus someone had save me
Omit away, dear loneliness.

[Aleaf]

[ Just as before ]

Do you ever regret?
What?
Of leaving me.
No.
Then... Why am I still here?
Because you’re leaving me.
Can’t I?
You may.
Then... Why am I still here?
You wanted to.
Can’t I?
Yes.
Then... Why are we still here?
Because there’s no way out.
It burns. It hurts. Can you hug me?
Yes. Just as before.

... the house burned down

-end-

[ Light Graffiti episode 2 ]

On my way back home.. I tried another project on light graffiti. while in the car this is some of the images I succededly took with some minor change of settings of my camera.. then voila!

Those are the other car's light

it was a bit shaky while this was taken but turned out to be nice

hehehe...

I'm moving at the speed of light!!! hehehe

boring bah so gatal-gatal jak nih

[ Sucka For Love ]

I'm addicted to kissing and hugging

touching and rubbing

I'm a sucka for love...

If you're addicted to kissing and hugging touching and rubbing

you're a sucka for love

[ Negativity ]

We live in a world with so many things to be dissatisfied; food, cloths, appearance, life, sex, etc….. there might be people gossiping about a girl’s dress (with that everybody-is-looking-at-me look) with a dreadful match in Hell Christian Lacroix’s black satin heels or having this thought of snatching someone’s partner because you‘re way gorgeous than that person he’s with.

Being pessimistic in a right place is tolerable. Some people discontented with everything. (Like the world's about to end) They were against everything that came pass their way. It’s like nothing pleases them. Diva like, flipping their hair, blotchy make-up, big haired people… not that I think all of them are drag queens. It’s just a depiction of what I’ve described girls who’re bitchy and fabulous. Guys have their own ego. They can be the DQ, normal or the pretenders.

When I’m elsewhere around the city with friends or my exs, we commented on things that does not complement with our sights in certain time. I realized I overload some of the conversation on bad remarks and somehow made some others feel uncomfortable. And I manage to tone down a bit. I was being optimistic with things going around but do I ever exclude myself from being negative? Nope. I don’t know why… seems fun to carry out such activity. But sooner or later I’ll taste my own medicine.

Being negative is fun… seriously everybody does that. But we need to be positive somehow. It’s an equilibrium in self-attitude. I might be totally wrong about this.. but people had their own perception on stuffs…

Cheers. Keep smirking. owh gosh.. so bored...

[ The 3 F’s ]

Wondering what're those 3 F's stand for? Friends. Foes, and For-display-only.

Friends… who doesn’t have one? Or thousands more? Friend is a person who entertains you for another such sentiments of esteem, respect and affection. They’re the one who treats you like… you’re there. They who you knew fondly for so long and they who you casually meet and greet. They’re the company you want when you’re broken (or broke) or when you just need someone to brag with.

Foes…. perceptibly they’re the enemy. Who back-stabbed you when you’re not looking, who pushes you off the 4^th Floor of the 1 Borneo Mall when they said “I have something to show you”. They’re the people whom we love to hate. You can either make them closer to you or you give them the silent treatment

For-display-only - The person you happened to go out with or just started to know each other would actually treat you as FDO. They didn’t mean it but their action made it much clearer. They’re the one who asked you to go for a date, but unwillingly for other people to see u guys went out. Or they just want to accumulate the number if their peeps. In a selfish sense, they just want to have their reputation protected without any consent of other people. So it's either they pleases their own self. PLT (People Like This) doesn’t need us. They only need their own mirror. A cheap one.

Trust yourself before you lend your trust on others.

[ And so it is ... ]

Search in my mind,
trying to figure it out
And thought
I was happy but I'm having some doubts
Think I found the answer and I know I must confess
I'm still in love with my ex

And I wasn't ready when I said that I loved you
And in my heart, I know that I gotta tell you
I shouldn't have gone from a situation to the next
I'm still in love with my ex

[taken from "Kelly Rowland - I'm still in love with my ex"]

[ I love Ellen DeGeneres ]

One of Ellen's episode was that she made a segment called

"What are those kids talking about?” (then there's a cue song at the back)

and she responded to a few Q from her fan mails about words that the ghetto or those rapper peeps used; Grill, chingy, Drop it like it’s hot, tail feather.... etc etc

Then again she always made more add ons to her segment. One of it is interpreting abbreviations being used in IMs or messaging term by young peeps and translating it to what much older peeps might intrepret on it.:

LOL (Laugh Out Loud) - Low On Lip-tore
BFF (Best Friend Forever) - Back From Florida
IC (I See) - I Can’t.
OMG (Oh My Gosh) - Ouch My Gallbladder
TTTT (To Tell The Truth) – I’m sitting over the keyboard aimlessly pressing the word “T” continuously

Hahahahaha.. I was ROTFALOL (Rolling On The Floor And Laughing Out Loud... Riqi told me this) after that segment.

I can't believe that was her. she's gorgeous here.

I love Ellen. She’s so funny. full of colours. and she's fun to watch!

[ Blog and Blogging ]

I personally believe blogging should be something you do to express your opinion or simply talks about something or even express everything into art (photography, video, poems, etc).

There’re people who wrote in a discreet manner as to hide themselves. That’s fine. They have all rights to do that (like the phrase “mcm suka hati sia lah mau buat apa”) . Some bloggers fake their writings. Because that’s how they portray themselve. Right? Being discreet and fake is two different things. Being discreet is ok. There’s reason to be discreet for certain peeps. Being fake is a capital BS.

I had a few bloggers who commented in my message box who asked me to link them in my blog. Do they even visit my site again? Or just as an add ons as to extend their blogger’s list. And people would look at their looong list thinking,

“owh this guy is cool and read so many blogs”….

Are they? I’m not saying all of them but there’s a bunch.

I put links in my blogs of other bloggers because I read their postings. I devote myself to read their posts. I don’t simply put them in just to accesorize. and we need simple and attractive blog as not to degrade our vision. Make people focus more on your writing and not the widgets and stuff. 1 or 2 is ok but when there's the WHOLE TOWN in there that's tooooo messy. If you're good with HTML and stuff make good edits.

I started blogging in Xanga.com in 2006 after my first ex (LTR) introduced it to me. Then I moved to Blogspot.com last year. Actively writing poems and everything ever since. I’ve been ALMOST honest in my writings and I don’t see any problem except to improve myself. Believe me there’re some mentality who can’t except and finding it hard to understand because there are writings that need a deep and high IQ to be understandable. I can’t say it’s my writings but some other genius writer.

Some of my friend (who happens to read my blog) asked,

“why do I write in such language?”

Because I want to improve. Not to show off (maybe a little). I mixed my sentences with bahasa though (with sabahan slang) . And I still refer to a dict. Yet still I made a few grammar and spelling errors. But I don’t mind. I learned. We’re only human. None are perfect. Even the news caster made mistakes. Like the other day this Indian girl on TV3 during a live midnight news (yah I watch news on TV3 also) simply pronounce,

“Capacity” as “Ka-pe-city”

and other mis-pronounciation (she was so addressing this british accent that she made so many annoying mistakes). Please do encourage yourself to write in languages. I mean do you want to embarrased yourself in later usage?

Go write! Enjoy. Write anything. Take pictures. Express yourself. Keep "B" to da "LOG"

I don’t mean to annoy or made any controversial statements. But... hey that’s ALMOST the purpose of blogging right? Writing in as much as you want. So I thank to who at least spent some time to be a reader. I’m not proud with what I’ve wrote but I’m glad somehow I let it all out in my writings.

This post is a continuance and merely an agreement to Ricky’s post (http://hushmonkey.blogspot.com/2008/08/why-do-you-want-to-blog.html).