[ He'll Never Be Me (part 2) ]

.... He broke-up with me at his place. That time I wasn't as astonished as the previous disintegration.. because I was expecting it. Along that 3 days he seem distracted by another contact. Who could it be? Awin obviously.

He said he couldn’t do it anymore. Hurting me, knowing the fact that something had happen. And he said he’s backing off as so to take responsibility of what he did. I’m quite befuddled by that excuse because... to me it wasn’t making any sense.

Another thing is… Ricky mentioned about not hurting 2 people at the same time. But alas he made a vow to Awin I think around Christmas 07.

It hurt so bad. Knowing that Ricky jumped to another person as not to let himself time to have that certain transition. Made me feel like being used for that 6 months period.

It took me months to recover. Ricky even lied to me that day when Awin came down to KK on December. Like that time… I called him like forever.. and he claims that he left his phone inside the car. And he claims that he went out with his cousins… but the fact was … he's not.

I felt like one of those girls in “John Tucker Must Die”.. minus the boobs and pussies.

Well.. then I’ve started to be sane again. Still stammered by the unfortunate event of mine… I’ve ran to KL. Suppose to work.. but then I cracked up (there’s a reason) and went back to KK a month after that. It was around May 08 until June 08.

There’s much to talk about my so called KL rehabilitation… But it’s not that important. All I can say that I’ve learnt and changed.

Awin had been trying to be in contact with me. But I’ve ignored his calls and texts. Ignorance is bliss. I just don’t have time for whores who doesn’t earn anything… but from what they’ve stolen from people before this.

Here’s a snippet of what he texted me during his partnership with Ricky…

“Why are you ignoring me?”

“It’s your fault that you never told me that you’re with Rick”.

Seriously this kid is much more sluttier than I thought.. If he already knew… Why would he still be around Ricky….Right? I mean It’s not my fault for telling the truth.. and who’s to blame for not being honest at the first place?

I was minding my own business and he bashed me up with rhetorical Qs that he would find answers inside that stinking heart of his.

Awin has a reputation... should I tell the stories? maybe next time.

Until now.. I am still confused as to why Ricky broke-up with me.. although he explained million of times. I know Rick would be reading and he would debate.. I understood the situations.. our situation. but I'm still dissatisfied with my short term relationship..

I'm hangin' on a thread until now. But I know I would be fine..

To be continued…